Frustration is a part of life.

Often times life feels like it puts things in your way just to harm you. Greater beings, karma, human powers...who knows. But it always seems like the universe has a way of playing you like a puppet on a string. Relationships are often similar. You find yourself in a battle between good and evil, trying to be the good supporter, spouse, friend, and relative. Yet often times you often feel misunderstood, misused, ignored, and forgotten. Sometimes I feel like I'm on an island all my own...like no one in the world notices me. And then there's other times that I wish I was on an island all my own and that everyone would just go away.

I don't appreciate feeling used. I'm sure that statement is an unfair assessment of the context it's being used in, but it's still the way I feel. Often times I don't get the affection I wish for, the attention I crave, or the consideration or understanding I feel I deserve. It's times like that that I feel used and treated like a martyr, a slave, or a ward. "Do this for me?", "Where is that?", "Can you do this?", "I need money for...." I feel like I'm here for everyone else's wants and needs, with no consideration of my own. I get frustrated, disappointed, and annoyed. Then I get cranky, and I take it out on those that make me feel that way. Is it fair? Probably not. Is it warranted? Who am I to be the judge? But I've learned over the years that some things never change, and frustration will always be a part of my existence. I can learn to accept it, fight it, or meet it somewhere in the middle. I'm still trying to figure out which one it is I want to do.